Nothing

I saw Nathan at the carnival this weekend. We made small-talk, but it was the scripted kind, where the words have to be forced out with the greatest effort. Needless to say, Nathan feels nothing for me. And what I feel for Nathan remains in the past--it is history. So, while my mother thinks that we "like each other" and are going to "get back together", (i.e. she's planning our wedding), it's obvious to Nathan, myself, and the rest of the planet that we can be nothing more than just friends. So, after the carnival, I had the regulation hangout with him and friends, and then the next day attended a standard invitation with him and the group. So that all being done, we shouldn't have to see each other again unless by accident. So the motions have been played out, and now we can go back to living our own lives, as the different people we have become. Jack and Victor--I'm done with them too. I have decided it's time to take a break from men for a while. And really, who could blame me? To throw the past away and be left with nothing is much better than to take up something false and hurtful.