Poison

The earth has opened up and swallowed my independent, private, and relatively happy lifestyle. Nathan came by yesterday, barging right back into my life with no consciousness of anyone but himself. After I had just come back from exercising, he waltzed right on in and "informed me" that I was going to a ballgame with him and his friends. Beautiful. I asked him if I could at least shower first.. He "consented" and as I took my hurried 4 minute shower, he sautered around in my place looking at stuff.. Then the final blow.. He got a job up here. He starts next month. He will be moving back to NY. Inside I was screaming, swearing. Outside I put on a stupid phoney grin. So anyway, not too pleased about that. However, I feel confident he will stay away. My artillery of a dull wit, poor conversation, overbearing timidity, and a foul over-weight out-of-shape appearance would be tough to beat. So although he's now back up here, he won't be in my life for long. In fact, I'll give it maybe a month before the lines of communication are cut--for good. So now with all this crap, I've been afraid to hang out with the lovely new friend I've met online. We are still talking, but I can sense that he's impatient to hang out. So perhaps Nathan's lines will have to be cut off much sooner. And after assessing the revulsion in his face and manner from the tremendous effects of my artillery yesterday, I'd say that's a great possibility. So I look forward to this poison being purged from my life once and for all!