Foolish Anticipation...

Ok---I finally wrote a reply to the guy next door. It was so lame! And I know he was just trying to be nice in asking me to dinner, but I know that the letter I wrote and taped on his door just now is going to completely ruin that. Naturally I had to make a big deal out of it, so he will certainly think I am a psycho---if not already--and he will definitely regret ever having suggested the dinner thing. He obviously feels sorry for me and when he reads what I wrote, how 'I'd like to and it would be fun even though he didn't have to ask
and I will either help or pay depending..', he will surely know that I am a complete psycho and be kind of like, 'umm...no thanks...' or 'well, i could bring something over, not a problem, just trying to be nice..' In the meantime I will feel like a total fool, as usual. 'Way to go' to me! I always manage to ruin everything and look like a fool by being super intense when obviously the guy just wants to be charitible.... Yes, I am, once again, an idiot! Now it' s just dreading, waiting in anticipation for the horrible reply. Boy oh boy. (Yeah, I don't even know how I could get such a notion that the guy would ever be interested in me because a. I'm hideous and he's not, b. I'm lonely and he's probably got someone or in a relationship, c. He's a mature, intelligent, well-rounded person, which I'm not. ) Well, let's just hope this whole ordeal of humiliation and rejection is over quick so I can move on quickly and forget about this week's blunder...